With Love, Dawn
by ImpalorOfHarlots
Summary: The story of the BSC lives' 12 years later as one memember struggles with her role in the war.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own any of Ann Martin's characters. I only own the ones I make up myself. _Chapter 1_

_Dear Mom and Richard, _

_Well, here I am at Fort Dum. Since my schedule has become rather strenuous before we _

_Leave, I can not tell you when my next letter will be. However I will try to call during a_

_layover. I shall try to secure a satellite phone. I wanted to let you know how much I love_

_you and to thank you for your support as I do this. I am going to make you proud and I_

_cannot wait to see you all again. Good bye._

_With love, Sgt. Dawn Read Schafer. _

I sealed the letter and sighed. It was difficult to write. My name is Dawn and my unit is

about to be sent to a dangerous place but still I am excited about the journey that is about

to begin. I trained hard in my five years in the Army. It was a hard decision to join, after I

graduated Berkely in Cali with my Environmental Sciences degree. Something told me to

go. I had to.

I'm originally from California and I grew up there, while living briefly in Stonybrook

Conn. I have long blonde hair, which I keep up most of the time also have blue eyes.

I'm currently single and would prefer to keep it that way for now. My old friends from

the BSC thought I would marry this man right after high school but we didn't work out.

We wanted different things. He didn't want to wait for me to come home if I got

Deployed and now that the moment is here I'm glad. And—

"_Paging Sgt. Schafer! Please report to Sgt. Winn's office!"_

Ah, duty calls.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: see chap 1. A/N: In chapter 1, the fort Dawn is at is Fort Drum, an actually Army base located upstate NY. Apologize for the misspellings and the improper spacing. Review if u'd like, criticism welcome.  
Chapter 2 

_Dawn,_

_Hey There! Hows it going? I didn't expect to hear from you so soon. Yes, I will be sending you quite a few packages, so please keep a look out! I just wanted you to know how proud we all are of you and I promise my next letter will be longer. Remember, I understand why you joined; these people need help. I'm sorry theres not more I can do. I cried last nigth just remembering everything that happened. Good luck Dawn._

_Love your sister,_

_M.A._

I wiped away a tear as I signed my initials. Of course, I'm crying. I'm Mary Ann Bruno. Dawn at war is very upsetting. The whole issue is upsetting. I'm happy that there are people out there making the world a safer place for Alma and Jake, my and Logan's young children. Yes, I married my grade school sweetheart. Go ahead, roll your eyes. Just know that hasn't been all great. Theres been some heartaches….Aside from the usual teenage love torment, breaks ups, Logan was almost killed in a car crash a few years ago. He still has the limp. Recently, almost ruined my marriage. Of course, I couldn't include this in my letter to Dawn. She has enough to deal with.

It was stupid really, now that I think about it. He was so charming and Logan didn't always come home at night. I was lonely. Well , at first it was just shameless flirting w/ a co-worker. I'm a P/T secretary (old habits die hard) at the ad firm in Lexington Kentucky. Logan and I moved here because of his promotion to Vice President of Marketing. Anyway, the man (his name was Bruce), was Logan's assistant. It never went further then holding hands and kissing. I got carried away. Logan found out when he caught us in the copying room. I thought it was the end.

Logan and I go to counseling. There, I learn to tell Logan how I'm feeling and he learns the importence of coming home at night. Oh, speaking of Logan, dinner doesn't cook itself!


	3. Chapter 3

Same Disclaimer applies  
Chapter 3 

_Dear Kris,_

_Hey! Well, I've been here for three months now. Thanks for the care packages! I appreciated them. It reminded me of the Kid-Kits we used to have. I've been thinking about the baby sitters club. I've had a lot of free time on my hands. It's been hard, Kris, these last few weeks. I'll be honest: morale is low, this hard and there is no end in sight. I'm trying to be helpful to my troops, but it isn't getting any easy. _

_My work is hard; there are a lot of people here, and the schedule gets pretty demanding. Tonight I have guard duty. It's slow and quiet. At least we sometimes have fun things to look forward to. (Although tofu is hard to come by, I managed to work out a deal with a buddy of my friend.) I've lost some weight (I'm a skinny rabbit again!) and I bought some presents for everybody. I hope you like yours. Our money is worth more here. At least I finally got a cooler and stuff for it! Oh, and if you can please send me some nylon stockings! (Their useful for keeping bugs out of my boots.) _

_I miss the life we all had; when all I had to worry about was being late to a BSC meeting. We need a reunion once I get out of this "sandbox" in a few months. Well I got to go!_

_Forever Your Treasurer,_

_Dawn_

Kid-Kits? Wow! I haven't thought about these in a while. I'm Kristin Leery former president of the baby-sitters club. Good times. Now I run my own business from home. I'm a real estate broker. I also run after my three year old, Andrew. He's named after my stepbrother who passed away a few years ago. He was very sick. My husband Denny is the president of a Sporting Goods store and together we coach Little League. The main office of the store is located in Stamford Conn, not far from where I used to live. That's where I met Denny, at my real estate class. He offered to help me with some work and I accepted. But funnily enough, I thought Denny was gay so I agreed. I had just ended a draining relationship and Denny came to school everyday looking like a member of the Fab Five. He carried a silk bag and always commented on woman's clothing. I thought it was cute and my classmate Allison hinted that he might be gay. It turned out he was straight and he had a crush on me. Who knew? After a brief dating period and a long engagement we married and not long after that Andrew was born.

Hmm. A reunion? I should've thought of it first! If I could get them together…it could take months. And with Dawn deployed, I should have enough time to get it all together to surprise her.

Wow! I can't wait to get started!

But first, I'll write Dawn a letter.


	4. Chapter 4

Usual Disclaimer

Chapter 4

_Dear Sis,_

_Hey Dawnie! We haven't heard from you in awhile. Dad and I hope your okay. Carol sends her love. I hope your okay. Write soon! We all miss you! We're proud of you!_

_Love, Jeffie_

_Dearest Dawn,_

_Hi sweetie! Just wanted to let you now that Richard and I miss you. I saw Mallory Pike yesterday. She's visting. I gave her your address so expect a letter from her. _

_We're thinking of you baby!_

_Love,_

_Mom_

_Dear Dawn, _

_Hey! Sorry for not writing sooner. I just got back from a biz trip to Europe. Claudia emailed me your address. Not much been going on work-wise. Just working hard trying to get a promotion. Wish me luck. Sam and Katie say Hi. _

_Katie's getting so big now, a year old already! Remember how hard it was for me to have a baby? Gosh, I remember complaining about how bad delivery would be. Well, all the stories are true. It hurt! I'll bet my labor stories are nothing compared to what you must be going through. _

_New York life isn't easy for Sam to adjust to. He hates all the noises. If my job at Bloomingdales weren't going so well, we would move back to Stoneybrook. Remember all our good times in SMS? I miss everyone._

_I saw Jessica today. She was walking up the steps to Julliard where she's been teaching. I saw her class perform a few times. She looks the same. Still a gorgeous dancer. She might be getting engaged soon! I don't know who he is though. She insists its someone we don't know. She has your addie now so she'll write to you to. _

_Kristy mentioned you needing nylons so I included some. Hope they help you out._

_I'm proud of you Dawn _

_Luv,_

_Anastasia McGill-Thomas_

Wow. Being away from home sure generates a lot of mail. I'm so glad I have friends and people who write to me. Some of my soldiers have no one. I always share anything I get, though. Mary Ann sent me a box of DVDs. A specialist here has a XBox™ so we can watch movies to pass the time. Some of them are watching them now. I can't wait to get out of here! I miss my Mom and Dad and Jeff and everyone.

I finally got a chance to go online. I stood in line for three-hours to get a crack at chance at the Internet. I emailed everyone, so I bet they'll be surprised.

For now I think I'll take a nap in the quiet….


	5. Chapter 5

Thanks for the reviews! Thanks for the critique Edie. Coming Next: Dawn's reason for joining.

I own only my characters, not Ann Martin's. (In case her lawyers are reading this.)

Chapter 5

_Dear Claudia,_

_Hey! I miss you! I received your letters, thanks! I'm good, except, for well, you know. The accident last month. I wish there were something I could've done. It was just too late. I tried to write their family a letter. I wanted to let them know how bad I felt. I may go visit them when I return. Sooner or later they will have to let us go home, right? I'm not really supposed to discuss what happens here in detail; I'm sure these letters may get read. I don't really know anymore. _

_I can't believe how big Will Jr. is! One year old already! And Claud! Seven months pregnant already! I can't wait to meet Mimi. I think that's a beautiful name for her. I bet she'll look just like you!_

_It really is amazing how you and Will met up again after all those years in Chicago. How's his job? How's your fashion line? Stace passed on a rumor that Bloomingdale's is looking into your fashions for expectant mothers. I cannot wait to see the other styles. Anything I'd recognize from SMS?_

_Well, Claud, I gotta run. _

_With Love, Dawn_

Wow. I still can't believe it. Dawn's right, I met will again after so many years. Now he's the curator for a top art museum. And me, so pregnant that Will worries about the reunion Kristy is planning. What if I have labor pains? What if I get ill driving? I settled this by reminding him that Stoneybrook is not the sleepy town it was. There are hospitals there. I mentioned that Mallory offered to come and drive me there and back. I haven't been in touch with Mal too much, so I thought it'd be great. And we haven't had a sleepover in years! Only this time it will be at the mansion. (I remembered that in grade school we had a few going away parties for Dawn there.)

I was sorry to hear about the accident. In fact, I saved a newspaper clipping of it. It had Dawn's name and picture, listing her as a hero, among other people. See there was a car explosion. Everyone must have thought 'car bomb', but not our Dawn. According to the papers, she screamed 'Land mines! Go back! Go back' and everyone ran away from the truck that was blown up. And according to the paper, they had the Marine Bomb Techs there and they confirmed it was land mines all throughout the road. So if those trucks had kept going… I can't think about it. If Dawn didn't realize that it was more then a car bomb, people would've probably ran to it to try to pull those other soldiers out. They also quoted Dawn as saying "This is my job" and "get that camera away from here, do you want to me to make you move it?" I was so proud of Dawn for saying that! And so scared when it was first in the news and I heard Dawn's unit named as losing two soldiers. Then Mary Ann called me crying and told me it wasn't her. Then the newspaper came out.

Now I must get Junior ready for his bath before naptime.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews. I appreciate them!

Disclaimer: I own nothing that Ann Martin created.

Chapter 6

_Dear Dawn,_

_Hey hun. I had some free time and I wanted to drop you a line. I know you didn't want to talk to me while we are both away, but I had to write you. M.A. gave me your addie._

_I'm sorry about what happened. Naturally, we have the same situations here. C'est la vie, huh? I've been pretty busy here, same stuff over and over. _

_I have been thinking of you a lot lately. It seems all my free time is devoted to thoughts of you and what happened to us. We were so good together, Dawn. I miss you. _

_Remember when we first met in SHS? Poor Stacey, thinking I was hitting on her. How is she anyway? Remember when we did the MS Walk in Manhattan and the walk over the Brooklyn Bridge? I loved volunteering with you and if I could do it all over again, I wouldn't change a thing._

_Except our break up. I know we haven't really talked in a few years. I know how much it hurt and I know it was my fault. Again I'm sorry. I want to prove to you how much better I can be, how much more I love you everyday. _

_I want very much to see you after this nightmare is over. I've decided not to re-enlist, I know your time is coming up to make this decision as well, and I hope you chose what your heart tells you. My brother-in-law has promised me a steady job, and the same can be done for you, if you so choose._

_Good-bye for now, my beach babe._

Yours, Ryder 

"Yours?" Who is he kidding, he will never be mine. I don't even know if I want to be with him again. How could Mary Ann give him my address? How did he get her number in the first place? What nerve, writing me after so long of silence. He made his feelings quite clear that night.

I guess I should explain. Ryder is the man everyone thought I would marry. Let me start from the beginning…

I spent high school in Stoneybrook after I moved back to Cali. I didn't want to divide up the year and go coast to coast anymore. I wanted to graduate with my stepsister who needed me after the fire. So I spent summers and vacations in Cali and the school years in SHS. That was how I met Ryder.

I remember the first day we met….

It was in freshman year, second semester. I went to my first class of the day, Physical Science. Yes, Stacey was in the class with me. So were Pete Black, Logan, Erica Blumberg and a few other people I remembered from SMS.

Stacey and I took a lab table together. Pete Black and a boy I didn't recognize were sitting with him. I had heard about this boy through rumors and gossip. He had moved here from a desert (which turned out to be Arizona), he was single and into blondes, was very smart, and came from a big family (he's actually an only child), and was incredibly cute. His name was Ryder Hammer. (Actually Banner.)

This last rumor was true. He was cute. He had blue eyes and sandy hair that he spiked up. He was wearing a long sleeved black T-shirt and black cargo pants with black sneakers. Stacey couldn't keep her eyes off him. (Neither could I.)

She said to me, "Watch this Dawn. He'll be my boyfriend before third period." She whipped out her hand mirror and checked her hair (straight now, she grew tired of perms) and her make-up. Then she giggled loudly to me, as if I had told her a joke. I saw Ryder glance at us and smile a little.

"Perfect," Stace muttered to me. "Now watch."

She slyly knocked her pencil of the side of her desk while she continued to giggle. Me, I was red with embarrassment, glad that the teacher hadn't come in yet.

Then Ryder smiled again. He glanced at the pencil, then at the other kids in the classroom, who, of course, where all staring at us. He picked up the pencil, examined the point. He looked at Pete and held out his hand. Pete handed him a sharpener and he began _sharpening_ the pencil. I couldn't believe this guy. Stacey just kept trying to look anywhere but at him. He then spoke.

"Excuse, me cutie. You dropped your pencil." He handed it to Stace, who winked at me.

"Anyway I can thank you for picking it up for me?"

"Yeah," he said, "you can write down something with that pretty pencil." He winked at her.

"What?" she started to lean towards him. Pete and the other kids just kept watching these two. I was so busy brooding at how embarrassed I was that I almost missed what Ryder said to Stacey.

"Your gorgeous friend's number."

"What?" Stacey and I said together. Then Stacey looked at me, smiled, and…gave him my number!

Sure I was pist at her. But I figured "What the heck?"

Long story short, we stayed together all through high school. We _were_ good together. He shared my feelings about the environment. He went to all my fundraisers with me to save the Earth and animals. He protested with me at school against selling carbonated liquids (soda) on school grounds. He crusaded with me against dissecting animals in lab. He rallied with me when in economics they wouldn't allow same gender marriages. He went with me to the airport and waited for me to come back. He respected my mom and Richard and my friends. We had our fights but still we always got back together in the end.

Damn, him. This is exactly what he wanted, me to remember our good times. But with the good comes the bad. Let me tell you about that.

Aside from our usual battles for animals and nature, he got me into volunteering for Awareness groups. Together, we did the MS Walk, Cancer Walks, Breast Cancer Walk, Lung Cancer Walk (Sunny flew in for that) and volunteered for CF (cystic fibrosis) and Juvenile Diabetes. We made many contacts, many of which joined us for our nature crusades.

Then Senior Year came. I already knew I was going to Berkeley with Ryder. We weren't too worried about the future. We knew we could always be back together. All was perfect.

Then in March, Ryder told me about a decision he had made. He was joining the Army. I immediately fell in love with the romantic idea of waiting for my soldier to come home. He told me he had to help his parents and that in the Reserves, he could still go to school. But he would be leaving me right after graduation.

I told him I loved him, that I would miss him. And later, as I told Mary Ann what he was doing, I began to think this through. In the Reserves, I could help people. I would get to travel to places I might never have a chance to see… but I would have to fire a gun, or worse, and hurt people.

I began to argue with myself. If I had to hurt people, it would be self-defense. I would be protecting myself. I could pay my own way through school so Dad could concentrate on Jeff's education. (He mentioned wanting to go to school for sports medicine.) Best of all, I'd be doing what Ryder was doing. I thought of all the contacts that I would make to help me in the future. I thought of coming home, in my uniform, to Ryder and he would be in his uniform.

I talked to mom. She was supportive but reminded me of the weapons and the physical and mental torture. Worth it, is what I had told her. I would be making a difference. When she realized how serious I was, she agreed it was okay.

Dad was a different story. He hung up on me, then called me back and told me about Vietnam and some of his friends. Then I mentioned that it was only the Reserves and the money for college. After he heard my reasons, he agreed. I could join if this is what I wanted to do.

I told all my friends. They were shocked, but proud. I told Ryder. I had never seen him so angry! He screamed at me, told me "NO YOU CAN'T GO! NO GIRLFRIEND OF MINE…." Then he got quiet. I didn't back down, didn't change my mind. He went to the recruiters with me. I would be trained in Oklahoma and then on to Virginia. I would go to college in Cali and report to a base there 1 weekend every month. And for summer break, on to Hawaii for more training. Every summer on a tropical island? I was so there.

The night before graduation, I met Ryder at our usual spot: the park. That's where he broke up with me. "Why?" I cried over and over. He said he didn't want to see me hurt. He couldn't handle so he felt it was best to be away from each other, give us space. I was devastated. And I was angry. So I worked hard and trained hard. We saw each other for awhile in college, but not like before. After 9/11/01, and we went to war, we lost touch. Last I heard, he was Airborne and now in Afghanistan. I guess he heard I was in Iraq with the 10th Mountain Division.

Now he wants to get back together?


End file.
